Monday, February 15, 2016

All the same

I've heard it said that women have different operating systems: some are Windows XP, others DOS, a few Linux... but every single one of them operates on the exact same BIOS. It seems clear after a short vacation with my American family, that evidence piles in favor of this saying.

A few weeks ago I went to the airport to pick up not only my mother, but my sister as well. In the beginning I thought things were going to be relaxing and fun as I showed the two around and they got to see my family here, but that wasn't the case at all. In the very beginning there was trouble with the airport pickup because I went to the wrong area, so I was sending IMs back and forth with my sister who was getting increasingly snippy while she was waiting past the tenth minute.

When I got to them, fifteen minutes after I promised, my sister came to hug me and I picked her up, carrying her towards my mother so there would be a big bear hug. And there began the first complaint: "Why didn't you hug me first and say hello before going to mom?" my sister asked.

And it was all downhill from there. From that moment on and for days onward, it was criticism after complaint after problem from her:

"Why do you keep walking around so fast? Stop rushing us and let us shop."
"Why are you sitting at a table with four seats if there are five of us? I can't sit anywhere."
"Yeah, it was five blocks away. You just said it was three, so you're probably lost again."
"It's not 12:00. It's 11:55."
"Stop wearing light clothes."
"Why are you wearing heavy clothes? It's too hot."

If these things sound like sibling teasing to you, imagine a head shaking, stone-faced, sighing, snarking girl with a constant look of contempt on her face saying them. These things were meant to criticize, not make fun.

Also, if this sounds familiar, it's probably because you read the Fights post where my wife was doing the exact same thing over several months, constantly criticizing and babying everything I did until I finally put a stop to it. And you probably also know that this is a woman's constant attempt to probe the men in her life for weakness to see if they need to be discarded, or abused to strength (s*** testing).

The absolute worst criticism was when my son was putting on Batman socks to go outside and he said Batman was for boys, and I heard my sister speak up with that "boys and girls are the same" garbage that led me to being a punching bag for women throughout my life.

That thinking led me to not understanding the psychological differences between men and women, from the seventeen years of brainwashing from my single mother that led me to worship women, to the fruitless four year search for a girlfriend where I wasted months of my life wooing women with kindness rather than strength, to the three years of emotional abuse with my wife because I never put a stop to her nonsense until 2012.

So when she straight up said my son was a sexist, I said, "Good."

I didn't look at her, but I heard her sputter and stammer, trying to figure out what I meant and asking for clarification, but I ignored her. As we were going out, though, she pushed a hand into my chest and didn't move, expecting some sort of answer. I hmphed, pushed her hand to the side, then walked outside. For a few days after that, she was on her best behavior and didn't ask again what I meant.

I could have hit her with everything I had learned about female nature and why I was raising my son to understand what makes women tick, but knowing that she has a direct line to my wife, I didn't want that knowledge to spread from my sister to her. I don't think my wife would take this knowledge and use it against me or our son, but it's better safe than sorry. I'd rather have my sister think less of me (though by passing her s*** test, it's ironically the other way around) than risk my son's welfare by letting any of this knowledge slip into the wrong hands.

It didn't stop there either, because later on, the five of us went to the main city to go eat and look around, and I could feel my sister's eyes on me every second of the trip, waiting to see me make a mistake so she could point it out and criticize again. After an entire day of this where I ignored her or reframed to tell her I did what I wanted, I knew she was out of control, so I made one final action.

When we waited for the bus to take us home, the driver said there were only five seats left, so he allowed two in front of us and three behind to go first, and our party of five could catch the next. My sister started whining and complaining about the numbers, fairness, lines and such. I told her the next bus would come in five or ten minutes, she continued to moan...

Then I looked her straight in the eyes and barked, "RELAX!"

She stopped immediately, her jaw worked but no sound came out, and I continued to glare. After I let out a dismissive, quiet, bull-like snort and looked away, I saw her still shaking her head in disbelief and jawing quietly in the reflection of the door, like she had never had someone talk to her like that before.

And again, for the next few days, she was calm and respectful again. She continued to probe weakly after that, but I swatted her aside with reframes and brash confidence which shut her up for hours after each attempt.

Her final probe came not too long ago, when she was telling me about how amazing the new Star Wars movie was. I like the series, especially the games in the Expanded Universe and even the prequels despite their flaws, but I had no interest in the new one when I saw that not only had George Lucas signed the rights away to Disney, and not only had the entire EU been declared non-canon, but that at least one of its most outspoken producers was a feminist and at least one of the writer/directors was a social justice enthusiast.

I thought that the movie would end up pretty predictable as a result, and so I never saw it, but my sister did and she loved it. I didn't want to have it out with her so I just commented that it was great she liked it, Star Wars is cool, generic stuff like that.

But she kept asking and asking if I had seen it, when would I see it, why wouldn't I see it, so I finally let her know. I didn't mention how the social justice part would lead all white males to being either ineffectual, hardly in the movie, dead or evil, while everyone else was as close to noblehearted and wonderful as possible (predictable and boring). I instead focused on the Jedi girl, by asking her if the character was every feminist hero I've ever seen:

- Does she succeed at something typically masculine in a fraction of the time that men needed (starship repair, bowcaster shooting, force use, lightsaber ability, etc...) to show that women are more capable than men at their own work?
- Does she make it clear in some form or another that she dontneednoman (refusing a hand up after she's fallen, pushing away a man trying to hug her or comfort her, straight up saying something about girl power)?
- At least once during the movie, does she manhandle at least three men much larger than her at the same time while hardly breaking a sweat?
- Does everyone in the movie, except the bad guys, spend inordinate amounts of time talking about how wonderful, special, intelligent, strong or independent she is?
- If she has a weakness, is it either that she lacks confidence (shy, introverted) or that she has too much confidence (condescending, bitchy), but otherwise, she's near perfect?
- Does she succeed at almost every task without much effort, or just straight up fail to fail?

I also asked if the movie was a complete rehash of Episode 4, kind of like the Star Trek movie by the same director which borrowed a bunch of stuff already done in previous episodes and movies. I described the original story, and she said no, the new Star Wars was completely different from the 1977 one. She also asked if I would feel the same about the hero if she were a man (changing the subject while not directly conceding the point that I was right, typical of a western person), and I said no, because it shows a lack of friendship, brotherhood and believability. It's the same reason I didn't like Royce from Predators, but I liked Dutch in Predator.

I think there was a prediction or two I got wrong, but for most of them, I was on the money. My sister tried to lie to me with some pathetically obvious body language (not voicing her nos, shoulders in, head tilted to the side with eyes tilted up), but I didn't call her out on it. It's just a movie, after all, and if some people find inspiration from it, I'm happy for them.

So naturally, after lying and ignoring the points I made about the movie being too predictable and boring for me, she stated that I hate women. I disengaged from the conversation immediately.

At that moment, I was glad that the top post of this blog contains the big six logical fallacies that westerners always toss around with viewpoints they can't disprove so they look foolish when they try in my comments section. And I was also glad that I decided to stop reading western news, perusing western comments sections and proactively engaging with western people, because this is what happens nearly every time with westerners who disagree, but can't disprove.

So here we are, vacation coming to a close and views confirmed once again: from family members to co-workers, from bosses to students, from girls I asked out and girls I dated to the girl I married, it's the same BIOS that seeks power before all else. My son will know these truths, to understand them and act accordingly.

Growing up being raised by a western woman like this, it's no wonder I was so ill-prepared for dealing with not only women, but men as well. I accepted the lies that people, and especially women, respect kindness and compassion above all else, and that led to decades of wasted life.

Women are smarter than you, more compassionate than you. You need to control yourself because nobody likes a brute. Be good, and love and respect will come your way, too.

But now that I know the truth of women, I just feel sad for girls in the west. They've been dealt a disservice by a post World War 2 culture that tells them how near perfect they are and how their constant dissatisfaction with their lives, with culture, with their families and country, should be constantly voiced and pointed at everyone but themselves. Western culture has created an entire population of narcissistic, entitled, overly critical and eternally devouring people that is never sated by any of the thousands of people and things they hork down.

I was never given a free pass by anybody I have ever known because I am a man: not my family, not my friends, not teachers, strangers or anyone else I've ever been in contact with. And I'm glad this is the case: if I had had my weakness coddled as a younger man, I never would have pulled myself up by my bootstraps as I did in college to go from fat, depressed loser to slim, confident man those many years ago. If I had had everyone kissing my butt, telling me how perfect I was and how nothing was my fault and how I should blame everyone but myself, I would still be that pathetic waste of space slimeball that I used to be because in my mind, I would have had no reason to change.

I used to watch out for my sister two decades ago because her father passed too soon and, like any young girl or boy, she needed to have a father figure in her life. I didn't know it at the time because I was still that depressed loser, that I would end up having any kind of influence over her as she came to me, day after day, to play video games and watch TV. By the time I realized what effect I had had on her life through spending time with her, calling her out on her nonsense and providing a role model (of sorts) for her, it was too late. By that point, I was removed from her life for several years while I was away at college, and by the time I returned home to save some money before going abroad, my sister had been poisoned by the toxicity of western culture. Foulmouthed, condescending, bratty, selfish, illogical, impatient, entitled... she was the entire ball of wax, and a perfect example of what happens when women aren't properly guided by both family and culture to tamp down that kind of behavior.

And though it took western culture over two decades to turn her into this jerk, it took just three or so moments of unrepentant a**hole from me to shut down my sister and return her to the place that her genes cried out for her to be: to the side and below a man who wishes what is best for her. Such small actions to fix such a big problem that only continues because people fear those little changes.

God help my sister's boyfriend if he doesn't understand what I do about female nature, because he doesn't just experience what I did for a few weeks: he gets it every hour of every day they are together.