It's quite strange that even though four months have passed since the last update, it still feels like 2014. Life is so monotonous and repetitive as a married man that every day is almost exactly like the one before. I'm even down to 4559 days left to go before I get my freedom back, but I still think that I'm stuck around 4700 or something.
I've continued to keep my pimp hand strong on my wife, using every one of the techniques of countering s*** tests that I've learned and written about on this blog for the past few years. I'm still kind to her most of the time, but I'm now intentionally making her jealous: showing her wallpaper pictures on my phone of women hotter than she, talking about lunch I've had with my boss or female co-workers, etc... I've never once let her talk down to me, I've never apologized for anything in the past year (even when I was in the wrong), I rarely give her compliments (maybe every few days or once a week) and I even more rarely say that I love her anymore. As a result, sex is on twice a week now. Go figure.
Now that my life has basically been relegated to first world problems, though my single life was miles ahead of, and infinitely more fun than, this sludge, I finally have a taste of what marriage was eighty or ninety years ago. And to be honest, it's still pretty lame. I'm glad I have my son and I spend a lot of time with him, but I think one of the big secrets to my success as a married man to a former shrew of a wife is thinking of her as temp help in the house. I live as if she could cheat at any moment and my only response would be, "If you get pregnant, I'll divorce you. Otherwise, do what you want." This kind of outcome independent aloof attitude is what gets my wife to bow her head or look away shyly when I address her, makes her act like a bubbly teenager when I suggest we do anything together, and what has made her take care of every chore in the house on her own, and begging me not to do them if I attempt one.
Life is going to fly by these next twelve years, and that's not a good thing. But at least it wasn't the hell my life was back in 2010-2012.
What you are showing your son? That men make their wives jealous to get fake obedience? Think about what you are teaching him or what she says to him when you are not around. Soon, she’ll confide in him that you are doing things to her and he’ll hate you for it. If you think he isn’t catching on, well, kids are smarter than you think and if he isn’t catching on, she’ll be sure to get him on her side soon enough. It’s better to divorce than show him a sham of a marriage where you play the part of a bully. Is that the kind of man you want your son to become? You? You aren’t doing your wife any favors or your son. You can get more with honey than with vinegar. I’m sure there are smarter ways to get your wife to stop her nonsense, other than being a childish bully. You can pull my post, but you still can’t get away from the fact that you are showing your son something far worse than divorce… you... at your worst in life.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your concerned post.
DeleteI act tough on my wife only when she steps out of line, and raise her jealousy once a week or two to prevent her bad attitudes. The other choice is to divorce her and leave my son with my out of control wife, his bipolar, suicidal aunt and his beastly monster of a shouting grandmother every other week. While I'm still married, I keep a tight leash on my wife's behavior and can protect him better. If you missed this info, I understand; my blog is pretty big.
"Doing things to her" seems as if you think I'm doing something physical to her, which has never and will never be the case; everything is tough words or long periods of ignoring her. If I misread your comment, I'm sorry.
If you're asking if I want my son to become me in the future, I can say this: I don't want him to marry, and if he dates in the future, I want him to tolerate absolutely no nonsense from his lovers and dump them at the first sign of them being out of control. If he chooses to stay after the red flags or God forbid get married, then yes, I want him to become me. If he marries and his wife gets out of control, I want him to do exactly as I do to find peace in the house.
As for catching more flies with honey, I'll just refer you to the link at the end of my top post which details all the fights and drama my wife gave me when I was nice to her every day from 2010-2012.
Finally, thanks for the comment on my son's intelligence. I think he's a pretty sharp tack too, better than his dad. I'm sure he'll avoid marriage in the future, better than the foolish mistake his old man did.