Friday, May 1, 2015

Marriage review, 2014 to 2015

Another year, another review day of the time I spent being married. Let's get to it:

Fights

I had zero fights with my wife this year, the same as last year. Once I knew what s*** tests were, how women use them and how to counteract them, I dropped my previous 30+ fights a year to absolutely nothing.

Chores

I didn't lift a finger around the house for the entire past year, except for maybe once or twice I did the laundry or dishes. My wife insists on doing all the chores every time, and unlike before, I don't do them anyway like a pathetic, grovelling beggar of female attention and approval.

Were I still single, I would have done every chore once a week. This marks the first time in seven years that my life has improved in some way because of marriage, but saving thirty minutes a week on chores is still not worth the trade-off of everything else I lost by marrying.

Sex

I get sex twice or three times a week now, because I no longer ask for it; I just start grabbing and escalating, even when she says she's tired. I've come to realize that she's just trying to act like an innocent, pure young woman when she refuses sex now, which is fine by me because she "relents" quickly and enthusiastically when I push for it. She's even directly stated afterwards how much she appreciated me being "wild."

If I hadn't married, things would be much the same, but I would have more varied (and openly enthusiastic) partners, so while it seems nothing much has changed, things would still be better if I were still single.

Money

I've saved nothing that isn't going towards family expenses or pending college bills, and I've donated $500 to charity.

As an unmarried man, I would have saved $5000 for emergencies, and donated $80,000 to charity by now. That's a lot of children that I could have helped.

Time Off

This year, I had 60 or 70 days off of work, all Sundays and holidays.

As a single man, I would have had two days a week off from work, at least 120 a year. If you include the time when I was planning to take a two or three month vacation every year, this number would be even higher.

Travel

I've lived in four cities.

As an unmarried man, I would be living in my eleventh city now, and I have a rough idea of where I would be living at this moment.

Friends

I've made two hundred friends, none of whom are still in regular contact with me.

As an unmarried man, I would have made about 2000 friends, and been in regular contact with about 20-30 of them. All those people I could have helped or learned from, all those experiences I could have had, all that potential, gone.

Fun & Adventure

I've had about five fun days out with my wife and/or son, all this year.

If I were still single, I could have written over 1200 Then and Now posts on my great life.

Summary

Another year has barreled past with nothing much interesting happening. My son is growing up and heading to first grade soon, my wife is losing weight and acting more bubbly, and I've learned many important lessons on how gender relations should normally be. Things aren't as bad as they used to be, but I still wish I were single. I wish I had more than that six months between getting abroad and my wife getting pregnant. I wish the next twelve years will speed by.

It would be great if I could go to sleep every night and wake up in the body of a single man, live a week in his life, then come back to live a single day of monotony as a married man. That way, I could have a fun and adventurous time in this "dream world," then come back to see my family and spend some fun time playing games or seeing the city with them before I headed back to the dream world once more. But I guess I'll just have to settle for mentally fast forwarding all the boring stuff, stopping only to spend time with my family, and hoping to get to 2027 as soon as possible. I can't wait to be free again.

3 comments:

  1. You are slowly killing yourself. You need a side girlfriend

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  2. Have you thought about getting a mistress or just using hookers? I heard in some cultures married men routinely have mistresses (in Latin America?).

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  3. My sex life has improved since I took my wife to task for her laziness, but even so, I've learned how to completely eradicate my desire for sex through persistent thought control. We are having sex again, but if we didn't, I easily manage.

    Thanks for the ideas, though. I mostly care that you two or anybody else reading this blog stay single or dating so you can keep your lives fresh.

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